Success or Lack There of, for NFL Teams Coming Off a Bye Week

One common thread of insight in NFL analysis is that teams coming off a bye week have an advantage against their opponent. The reasoning behind this theory is the extra week of rest allows the team to recover from injuries and scheme for the upcoming opponent. When given two weeks to watch film and prepare of an opponent's defense an NFL coaching staff should be able to develop the strategies needed to between them. However, I was never convinced that the bye week actually gave teams an advantage. So, I decided to look into the data from all 32 NFL teams over the five season between 2010-2014 (2015 was excluded because when I created the data set there were still teams that hadn't had a bye). I wanted to know if the conventional wisdom was right.

Shootyhoops Basketmakers: The NBA's Most Fuckable

NBA PILFs

It only takes a few games before any basketball fan starts to think of the most important factor in one’s enjoyment of the sport: which NBA players do I most want to fuck?  There are a thousand factors in any basketball game, for both the players and fans, but this is the question at the core of the very sport.  Many have gone insane trying to rank every NBA player, while men like Mike Fratello long ago realized exactly who was their number one PILF and refuse to let any know, lest they lose their chance at glory.

For new fans, this can be a daunting hurdle to overcome in basketball fandom.  Granted, it is much easier to simply abandon the sport than work out if Thabo Sefolosha is more sexually attractive than Damon Stoudamire.  These are important questions and questions that must be answered.  Any society that believe itself to be advanced absolutely must consider which of its basketball players are the most fuckable.  Certainly, this is a much easier question when thought of as a singular answer; that is, there must be only one correct answer to this, as only one NBA player is truly who you want to fuck. 

If this were true, there would be no problem at all: the answer is Chandler Parsons.  However, this ignores the real issue here.  Every NBA player needs to be ranked by how fuckable they are in comparison to their fellow professional basketeers.

Is personal taste involved in such a question?  Is it a completely subjective idea that cannot have a perfect answer?  No, of course not.  There are very exacting standards that must be agreed upon by all and cannot be argued in any way.  Fuckability is objective, especially in NBA players.  If you believe otherwise you are the devil.

For the layperson looking to be laid by a person, there are a few important parameters to keep in mind.  The rankings listed below[1] follow a very well thought out and not at all ridiculous set of measurements as to just why one player is more desirable than another.  This is a scientific study done for the good of mankind.  About which NBA player you would rather fuck.

Shootyhoops Basketmakers: The 1977-78 Philadelphia 76ers

The Pinnacle of Basketball

The 70s were a time when just about no one cared about basketball for any number of reasons.  It was a time with a number of strange characters in the league but no real legendary teams or players, at least for the most part.  This is, however, due to most people overlooking what was the greatest collection of basketball players to ever exist.  I am talking, of course, about the 1977-78 Philadelphia 76ers[1].

To understand the beauty of the 76ers, one must start at the top: Julius Erving.  The founder of Orange Julius and the first medical doctor to play in the NBA, Erving could do just about anything he wanted on the court.  Famously, Erving was able to hold the ball out of bounds as he leapt along the baseline and still twist it around for a layup.  This was an amazing feat, especially considering that he would leap along one baseline before blinking out of existence and reappearing in mid-air beneath the opposite basket.  His physical gifts were so that it still boggles the mind to see what he was able to accomplish.  He also had a significant afro, even in an era of afros.  Even Darnell Hillman admitted that yes, that is a pretty good afro.

The No Longer Invincable Legion of Boom

It is amazing how fast things can change in the NFL. Just last year, 2014, the Seattle Seahawks defensive secondary was so feared in the NFL that teams developed game plans that excluded long passing, shut off whole sides of the field, or just gave up on trying to throw all together. Heck, even this year in week 3 the Chicago Bears decided that their best chance to beat the Seahawks in Seattle was having their QB Jimmy Clausen pass only nine times in the first half. The Legion of Boom, the Seahawks secondary, was feared. In nine short weeks the Legion's reputation has been completely shattered. They have gone from being feared to being a weakness teams try to exploit.

In week twelve, the 49ers decided to have Blaine Gabbert throw 34 times. Gabbert completed passes of 31 and 36 yards. In last weeks game against the Pittsburgh Steelers Ben Roethlisberger threw it 55 times for 456 times for a passing yards record at CenturyLink field. The Steelers completed passes of 41 yards, 40 yards, and 69 yards. They attempted several other big pass plays that fell incomplete. The 49ers and Steelers obviously had no fear of the Seahawks Legion of Boom.

The reason for the change in reputation is this season string of agonizing fourth quarter collapses. Before the Steelers game every quality quarterback that had played the Seahawks had been able to beat them with passing in the fourth quarterback. Watching Rogers, Dalton, Newton, and Palmer were all able to march own the field and score at will against the previously impenetrable Seattle pass defense. Watching the Seahawks fail has obviously given opposing teams confidence in their ability to beat them in the air.

There are lots of theories for why the Seahawks secondary is worse. It could be Kam Chancellor hold out. It could be the promotion of Kris Richard from secondary coach to defensive coordinator. Maybe Richard Sherman and/or Earl Thomas are still suffering from last seasons injuries. Personally I think it is the price of paying three All Pro level talents (Sherman, Thomas, and Chancellor) has caught up with the Seahawks and prevented them from field a competent corner beside Sherman or nickelback in passing situations. Cary Williams and Marcus Burley are clearly worse than Byron Maxwell and Walter Thurman.

Whatever the reason the Legion of Booms aura of invincibility if clearly gone. Fans can no longer rest assured that any fourth quarter lead is safe. I hope the Seahawks front office regains their magic touch and figures out a solution to return them to their dominance this off season.

Shootyhoops Basketmakers: Darryl Dawkins

First Contact

In the 1950s, the United States and the USSR were embroiled in a bitter space race.  Both were desperate to prove their superiority over their rival in any way they could.  The Cold War was in full effect, and nowhere was it colder than in space.  Why both sides decided to define “Cold War” so literally is anyone’s guess, but still.

There is Always Next Year

One of the great things about sports is that teams get a chance to start anew every season. Your record from the previous season is whipped away and you start fresh with a 0-0 record just like all the other teams. Your team has a chance to win it all. This perpetual refresh of the records lets fans continue to hold out hope for the future. Even if the current season is going poorly there is always next year, when things will be different.

After the Seahawks loss on Sunday Night Football to the Arizona Cardinals I find myself convince that the 2015 season is, for all intents and purposes, over for my beloved NFL team. Sure, they are not officially eliminated from the playoffs. The Atlanta Falcons could continue their free fall and the Seahawks could maybe sneak into the playoffs as a wild card. Even if they did manage to pull off that impressive feat it would mean that to get to the Super Bowl they would have to win three road game in a row against playoff caliber opponents. This is highly unlikely.

 

All season, with the possible exception of the game against the Dallas Cowboys, the Seahawks offensive line has been terrible. As I discussed in an early post Pete Carroll and John Schneider really blew it with this year's offensive line. They seemed to think their track record of finding diamonds in the rough and developing stars was enough to let them turn two defensive players and a tight end into an NFL quality offensive line. It completely backfired.

Instead of the offense featuring a punishing ground game followed by explosive plays through the air, we have had to suffer through one of the most inept and truly awful offensive performances by the Seahawks since before Mike Holmgren was the coach.  The line consistently make drive killing penalties. When they aren't doing that they are blocking with the skill of a matador. Defenders find themselves in the backfield at unbelievable speeds. The offensive line forces the Seahawks into situations with 10+ yards required to convert over and over again.

The Seahawks offenses inability to sustain drives and stay on the field has impacted the defense.  The Seattle defenders are asked to play 35-45 minutes of the game. Their stamina and conditioning is constantly put to the test and it has failed several times this year. The volume of snaps they are asked to defend means they are bound to make a mistake eventually. The other team's offense just has too many chances to figure them out. This has resulted in five blown fourth quarter leads in five Seahawks losses. Yes, every Seahawks loss has come in the fourth quarter.

However, not all of the defense's problems can be pinned on the big boys tasked with defending the trenches. The defense is not as deep or as talented as in years past. The Legion of Boom only has four interceptions through nine games. Former All Pro cornerback Richard Sherman still doesn't have an interception, though he has had plenty of chances slip through his fingers. Byron Maxwell's replacement, Cary Williams, has looked somewhere between mediocre and bad. Cliff Avril and Michael Bennett are playing at the highest levels of their careers, yet there isn't much in the way of depth on the defensive line. When Avril and Bennett need a breather the pass rush is noticeably worse. The defense just isn't as good this year.

Quarterback Russell Wilson has struggled this year. Instead of taking the expect next step to the true upper echelon of NFL quarterbacks, Wilson has regressed. He is missing throws to open receivers. He forcing balls that have little or no chance of being caught. Many of these issues can be at least partially attributed to the offensive line. They have failed so miserably at protecting their quarterback that he appears to be getting anxious in the pocket. He doesn't wait for routes to develop. He avoids pressure that doesn't exist. He fumbles the ball in crucial situations. However not all of the problems can be blamed on Gary Gilliam et al. Wilson has played worse on his own as well.

Some people think he is distracted with off the field issues. Others think he is finally running out of the luck that propelled him to two consecutive Super Bowls. I think he is just having a down year at the most inopportune time. Whatever it is Wilson is clearly playing at a lower level than we have come to expect in Seattle.

All of this negativity and complaining brings me back to my opening thoughts. Sure, the Seahawks are bad this year. Their team's talent is too shallow and their offensive line too horrendous for them to have any legitimate chance at winning the Super Bowl. Their once dominate defensive has started to come back down to earth and their talent quarterback is struggling through a slump. However, they still have some key pieces in place.

Their quarterback is young and talented. Just a year ago we were debating if he belonged in the list of top five quarterbacks in the whole NFL. The Seahawks key defenders are locked up for the next few years and their front office has shown a knack for finding guys in free agency and the draft. Rookie running back Thomas Rawls has shown signs of having the skills required to replace Marshawn Lynch as the cog that makes the offense work. Things aren't all bad in Seattle. There are signs of good things to come. They should be able to make a run in the near future. There is always next year.

Shootyhoops Basketmakers: David Thompson

David Thompson, All-Seeing Time Lord

In the early 1970s there came the dawn of a new era of basketball and perhaps no player represented that era better than David Thompson.  Thompson was a new evolution of the basketball player, spending his time either dunking the ball or snorting cocaine[1].  What set Thompson apart as a trailblazer was his most consuming hobby: time-travelling.