Wait, What: Matt's Team Wins

"I shall destroy you."

In the long history of my life, all twenty years of it, rarely has a team I truly rooted for had success, and certainly not extended success.  Sure, the Sonics were consistently good in the 90s, but I didn't realize they were their until Ray Allen and Rashard Lewis were arguing over who could play the most lackadasical defense, only to be overcome by the team moving to a state with more cases of depression than citizens.

Baseball never faired much better.  Sure, the Mariners had '95 and '01, but both ended in disappointment (especially 2001).  The Padres had their World Series trip, but that died away with the exodus of every good player not named Tony Gwynn, something that helped unite the world in their mutual hatred of Steve Finley.  What's that?  Only I hate him?  Well, close enough.

Football?  The Seahawks were consistent playoff performers in my life, but most of that has been rightly attributed to having to beat out what are essentially high school teams (Alex Smith?  Seriously?  Hell, might as well let my dad start for the you, the 49ers).  Even their one great year, when they won the 2005 Super Bowl, was ruined by them not actually winning the 2005 Super Bowl.

This, of course, brings us to hockey.  Now, I have no geographically convenient hockey team, and no history of hockey fandom in my family.  This meant I could choose any NHL team to be my favorite, even a perennial winner.  Hell, the Red Wings even had an in with me thanks to my storied excellence in NHL 98, where I dominated my brother in every aspect of the game due to my superiority, and definitely not because I had Steve Yzerman and Sergei Federov.  To put it short, I chose the Canucks.  The never-won-a-Cup, only-made-the-finals-twice Vancouver Canucks.

In pyschological terms, this makes me insane.  Was it a good choice to choose a team whose history includes the 2nd worst jersey ever made and an All-Star more concerned with getting assault charges?  Of course not, but I did it anyways, perhaps out of some sick masochistic streak.  Luckily for me, things have strangely worked out well.  Those two soft Swedish twins who the Canucks built around?  They became two of the best players in hockey.  The jerk American who just took dumb penalties?  Perhaps the best two-way forward in the world.  Kyle Wellwood?  Well, at least he ate enough for the team to get fed up with him (Get it?  Fed up?  Eh?).

All of a sudden, the Canucks are in the midst of a dream season.  The best team in hockey, the Canucks have already won every available trophy as they celebrate their fortieth anniversary, winning their division, conference, and leading the league in points.  Even without these physical honors, the Canucks have dominated really every statistical category, finishing first in goals, goals against, powerplay, and really everything except the penalty kill, which they finished second in (which is of course shameful).  Every injury has been matched by some young guy or unknown vet excelling.  There really has been no disappointment whatsoever this season, and now the Canucks are in the Stanley Cup Finals.

Does this mean they'll win?  I certainly think so, but I wouldn't be surprised if they lost due to a combination of poor officiating/sudden acts of God.  That's just how sports goes in the Pacific Northwest.