Hockey's Southern Experiment

A lot of talk has been made, mostly by me to people who have no interest in the subject, about the ridiculousness of hockey in cities like Phoenix or Nashville. All this has made me think about cities that would be better suited for hockey, as I've often spent my precious time dreaming of seeing hockey teams in towns that actually support them. Of course, these dreasm have been crushed a la Freddy Kreuger by the evils of Gary Bettman, but that's not the point. Even so, I've constructed arguments for several cities in the hopes that Darth Bettman reads this blog, as I'm sure he does, and takes my adivce, which I'm sure he would.
Winnipeg: Sure it's a smaller town than any of the major Southern cities with hockey teams, but it's really all about ticket sales and a ssuch, any midsized Canadian city, be it Winnipeg, Hamilton, or Quebec City, would certainly pack the house every night, even for a bad team. Even if they don't exactly sell out, Canadians will support a terrible hockey team in a way no Southern city ever would (see Maple Leafs, Toronto).
Yellowknife: Hell it can't be worse than Phoenix, and almost 100% of the population would attend the games. Sure, that's only around eighteen thousand, but still...
Hartford: Again, the argument basically boils down to that, while Hartford didn't draw great its last couple years, the main reason for this probably was the fact that the Whalers were consistently terrible for their entire history. However, Hartford provides a knowledgeable fan base who would probably sell out most games for an average to good team, something Tampa Bay can only wish for. Plus, the history is already there and there are quite a few fans from the old Whalers days praying to see some hockey again.
Toronto: Basically, the Maple Leafs are the Yankees of hockey, except without any success. At all. Like, its embarassing guys, come on. Toronto is a big enough market to have a second team, and competition that close would give the Maple Leafs a bit of motivation to actually win once in awhile. Plus, if the second team turns out to be the Mets in this analogy, the Maple Leafs can always point to them and tell their fans that it could be worse, they could have Oliver Perez in net, who honestly would probably be better than Vesa Toskala at this point.
ESPN Studios in Bristol: This way, ESPN would have to be allowed to actually air some games and maybe, just maybe, somebody other than I will watch hockey and actually be able to say something intelligent beyond "boy, that Sidney Crosby sure is good."
Anchorage: Hear me out, but I think Anchorage could support a team at least a little better than some of the cities now. Certainly, travel costs would be ridiculous and possibly cancel out any advantages. However, they'd be the only pro game in town, which certainly helps galvanize a fan base (just look at the Trailblazers). Alaskans are generally fans of hockey and at the very least most all of them understand the game, which is a plus rarely enjoyed in many other cities.
Stockholm: Hey the NBA wants a European division, and Bettman's only a little stupider than David Stern. At least they'd draw well?
Seattle: I can dream, can't I? Seriously though, Seattle fans have taken to soccer like no other despite knowing nothing about it for the first year or so. Seattle is desperate to prove it's a major sports city, a need grown not only from their hatred of the East Coast bias prevalent in sports, but also from the recent loss of the Sonics. Plus, if fans are willing to sell out soccer games, then they certainly would watch hockey.
Las Vegas: Well, they'll gamble on it at least, so there's that revenue.
Dallas: It sounds ridiculous when you hear it, doesn't it?